3rd and 4th Drafts: Use the system or not? - Aaaah I'm stuck!

In the second draft the dramatic question was missing. By giving Peter the opportunity to decide if he wants to use his dad's political status to get out of prison or not presented a very interesting dramatic question. I was not really happy with the third draft so I tried another scenario in which the character is already out of prison and goes through a major change of mindset. Both drafts were written in between feedback sessions.

Major Changes 3rd Draft:

• Adding a dramatic question

Major Changes 4th Draft:

• Different point in time

• Different character

#1: The 3rd Draft

This dramatic question is in this draft is very rationally analysed and then I wanted to earn the end of not answering the question but letting the audience think about if they would do it or not.

#2: The 4th Draft

#3: First time talking to Zois, my personal tutor

Because I was still not completely convinced with the scenario I had, I kept thinking and tried other ways away from the prison cell or psychiatry. I had multiple ideas for scenarios and multiple drafts that would lead to a different directions. I was quite indecisive and stuck in the process.

To get an overview I made a mind-map about all the different scenarios and the elements I want to have in the monologue.

Zois is very popular for being direct and honest. His comments to my first few drafts were not very positive...

I thought being dramatic means shooting with all of the characters heart into one direction without any understanding of another perspective. Hearing Zois say that my draft was one dimensional and the world is more complex than the words I put into my characters mouth was as embarassing as inspirational. It reminded me of a conversation I had with a collegue, when I was working as an engineer in a corporate firm. Where I was telling him that so many things are going wrong in our company and if they changed some things, everything would be better. And he showed me consequences that I couldn't see because I did not see what other things were affected. The System is mostly more complex than we first think and we benefit in ways we don't even know.

To be able to put understanding of the complexity into the character was eye opening.

#4: Automatic Writing

Zois could sense that his feedback slightly blocked me within my chosen topic and the scenario I was going for. I asked him what I could do to get out of it and how I could make the text more accessible.

His answer was Automatic Writing. He told me I should take one day off, not think about the monologue at all and then sit down and write everything down that comes to my mind.

I decided to do it in german because it would help me overcome the language barrier and get the thoughts out of my head in the way I really mean them - without having to think about language. Then I translated it.

This is what happened: